Shit Movie of the Day – White Chicks

Alright, I am just going to come right out and complain about this movie in the opening of the post.  Typically I leave the opening to set up the readers for the state of mind that I watched this movie in or just to set up the shit storm that I walked into here, but I just to have to complain immediately.

This movie should not have even made it into production after the first makeup test.  The makeup to make these two black guys looking like white chicks is absolutely on the level of Leatherface quality.  It looks as if they cut the skin off the people they are supposed to look like and layered it on top of their faces that happen to have cotton balls on top of them.  It is atrocious and downright fucking horrific to look at.  But no, they kept the makeup, which I am assuming that they did one makeup test on and were high-fiving one another as it was money in the bank.

Prepare to have me talk about the hideous makeup and shitty premise some more.

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Shit Movie of the Day – Epic Movie

You know, parody movies use to be some of my favorite comedy movie around.  Airplane!, The Naked Gun series, Top Secret and Mel Brooks movies were the essential comedic movies in my youth.  These “parody” movies such Disaster Movie, Meet The Spartans, even Scary Movie are just raping the corpse of comedy.  This Epic Movie just made me angry.  I honestly feel like these were made for kids to have a movie to go to so they can text and talk.  Parody movies are supposed to be insightful with their lampooning and satirical take on the subject matter.  This is just everything that is wrong with comedy.

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Shit Movie of the Day – The Hottie and The Nottie

Apparently I don’t hate myself enough because I had to sit through this movie.  By sit, I mean I had to constantly pause and then start again after I took like a 20 minute break.  It took my 3 hours to basically get through this movie and it is only 90 minutes long.  I didn’t even know that this movie existed and frankly I wish that I hadn’t because this is the most vapid, insufferable movie I have ever seen in my life and I watched Jack and Jill.  So fuck Paris Hilton, cause who hasn’t, and fuck this movie.  Lets dive into this cesspool of vapid waste and film.

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Movie of the Day – In The Loop

There is something about British movies that make genre films just one more notch better than their American counterparts.  Now I know that sounds elitists and that it makes me seem like I sit around watching BBC television while sipping tea and saluting the Union Jack.  While I do like BBC television and tea, I don’t own a Union Jack flag nor spell words like “neighbor” as “neighbour” in acknowledgement of Queens English.

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